Lost and Found
Have you ever read the parable of the prodigal son and wondered what happened to his older brother? Well, here’s my attempt at sharing his side of the story.
The young man sat
under the huge tree just outside his father’s house, grateful for its shade.
His back was turned
away from the house, away from the blaring music, away from the scurrying
servants, away from the smell of grand food wafting towards him. His head was hot
from working all morning in the field and his stomach was rumbling. He gulped
down the last few sips of water he had carried with him and stared into the
open field.
“I’m not going
in”, he told himself as
his stomach rumbled again.
A cool breeze blew
towards him, causing the little swing on the tree to bump into him. He held it
close and remembered the day his mother cajoled him to let his younger brother
sit there even though he had finished all his chores and had just settled into
it.
They always pampered
him. He’s younger than you- let him have this, they said. He’s small, he doesn’t
understand- you compromise, they said. And when he finally left, taking his
share of our inheritance with him, they wept for him for days, while I stayed
close because I had to pick up the pieces of their broken hearts.
When I finished my
chores, I had to help him with his. When I achieved anything and got a reward,
I had to share it with him. And for the last year and a half, I’ve been doing
all his chores too, carrying the load of two men alone, using all my free time
to cheer up mother and father, without any respite or time to worry about what’s
happening to him. And this is what I get.
His head was even
hotter now. The shade and the water did not help calm down his anger. I’m done
being the responsible one. I should have left before he did. That would have taught
them all a good lesson. Then he would be stuck with all this work and I would
have roamed free.
He stared out into
the field again. What lies beyond that, he wondered.
Where would I have gone
if I had all that money to spend? Gone into the next town and began my own
business? Met a girl and bought a house to start a life with her? He laughed at
his own thoughts, acknowledging that he would never have made it that far without
turning back. Mother and father had dreams of their own too and they pushed
them aside to welcome me into the world. I couldn’t possibly be that ungrateful
as to take half of all their life’s labour to spend it on myself. That too, while
they are still alive. What would they have managed on? How would they face the
prospect of old age without a responsible son around? No, no, no…that would
have never worked because I just don’t have it in me to break their hearts like
he did.
He was the pampered
one because he could never keep up with me, never do anything as well as I
could, never found his place in life as a man.
And now that he’s back
(empty-handed without a doubt), they are feasting over him, delighting in him
all over again. And I’m expected to just join in the revelry??! Who is going to
account for the fortune he lost? Who is going to tell him he has to start doing
his share of the work? Who is going to give me a break to do what I really want
to do with my life?
Yeah, its great that
we have such merciful parents that they just welcomed the prodigal son home.
But where is the justice in all this? What do I get for obeying and serving my
parents all these years? No inheritance? No lavish party in honour of the
responsible son? No vacation with my friends? It’s just so unfair. And now they
expect me to just go on in this drudgery, working all day, while they go back
to fussing over him??!! No chance!
His stomach growled
once more, silenced only by his pride. He bowed his head and tears rolled out. They
are all so busy delighting over him and feeding him that no one has even
noticed I haven’t returned home yet. Hot tears kept streaming down his face as
the swing bumped into his head once more. He got up, broke the tiny swing into
two with one clean move and hurled the pieces around the branch so they wouldn’t
hurt him anymore.
He sat down again in
despair and cried so loudly he didn’t hear the footsteps behind him.
It was Father. He sat
down besides his grieving son and lowered his head in grief too, saying nothing.
They sat in silence for a while, until Father began to speak, “Please…”. No,
said the young man. I’m saying no. Now you need to listen to me for a change.
All these years, I’ve said yes to everything you asked of me. I worked harder
than your servants did, just to please you. And that rascal has eaten up half
your savings and now you intend to spend my half on him too?! What’s left for
me, then?! Where’s my fatted calf? Where’s my party? What do you have for me?!!!!!
Their eyes met and even through his angry tears, he could see the love in his father’s eyes. The silence was broken by another stomach rumbling but it wasn’t his. His father had stayed hungry too. They both broke into an awkward laughter at the sound of the old man’s stomach rumbling. And for a moment, a very brief moment, they both forgot why they were sitting there, under the huge tree, right in front of the house.
Son, your brother was
dead and he has come back to life. He was lost and now he’s found. I wouldn’t worry
too much about him now. Those worrying days are behind us. I’m sitting here
with you, being hungry with you, because I’m more concerned about what’s going
to happen to you.
Me??! Are you
serious, father?! I can take care of myself. I have always been the responsible
one.
And yet, you need
your Father right now to sit beside you and work this one out, don’t you? I
have a lot more to give you than property and money, my son. So, if you are asking
only for that, you are asking for way too little. Do you understand what I’m
saying? The son wanted to understand, but no, he didn’t understand- at least not
yet.
After a lot more talking
things through, he looked up at His Father’s eyes again and he finally saw it. He
was the apple of his father’s eye. He was the favoured one. And His father was
absolutely right- everything his father had was his. His father never ate
without him eating, never slept without checking with him how his day went,
never went out with his own friends to gamble like the other fathers did. His
father stayed home, stayed faithful to his family and made sure everyone was
ok. And he was his father’s son, the apple that didn’t fall far from the tree.
His father had poured himself out into his favoured son so that his son would never
be alone on the path to holiness.
Suddenly, he saw himself
through his father’s eyes. His father was proud of him for being so much like
him. His father loved him so much he would rather be hungry with him, than
feasting with everyone else. What he was going to inherit from his father in
terms of money and property meant absolutely nothing compared to what he had
already got from him. I have my father’s character. I have my father’s sense of
justice. I have my father’s passion to work hard in honest labour. But most
importantly, I have my father’s heart. And in that moment, he could look into
the heart of his old man, so relieved that his son whom everyone had taken for
dead, was alive and home. In that moment, he could see his father’s heart, full
of hope for the future. Father, are you sure, he’s changed? He asked. I’m sure,
replied the Father. But I can understand your hesitation because a lot has
happened. Maybe the four of us need to sit down together and talk it all
through, make sure the boundaries are set right this time around. That will
really give our family a fresh chance.
Son, both of you are
my sons. Both of you have rights as well as responsibilities. But they won’t
always be equal the way you want them to be. People are different and we need
to figure out our relationships with the reality of who people are rather than
the image of who we want them to be.
Well then, if
you can trust him again, I suppose I can too, Father. But only with your help.
Your house, your rules. I will go by your sense of right and wrong, your sense
of justice and mercy. I will submit to you in all that you ask of me, but I reserve
the right to do it freely.
Of course, my son, I already
have all the servants I need. It is my sons I want to spend my time with. You
are free to be the best version of yourself under my roof. And you are free to
fail too. Because as I have already proven today: my heart is already big enough
for the most wasteful son.
They hugged long and
hard until their stomachs growled again. Let’s go eat! Said the father, in
great cheer. Not before I hug my mother and brother just like you hugged me,
replied the son.
As they walked back
to the house, with their arms around each other, the young man shuddered. I
came so close to losing my father forever today. And as he looked up at
their beautiful big house, he thought: I would willingly give all of this up,
just to be more like the man my Father is today. Just before they crossed
the threshold, the son turned to the Father and said: Thank you Father for searching
for me. I was lost but now I’m found.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5H0nyOmbaRg
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